My life seems to be controlled by money .. or the lack of! Im sure I spend half my life checking my online banking to see whats come in or gone out. With christmas fast aproaching im feeling it even more. The christmas presents for the kids are all done but I still have nephews and my brother and sister in law to buy for , not to mention the big food shop. Im waiting for a maintenance payment to go into my account, at the moment I have £9.86p in the bank and maybe three pound in my purse. The children all need money for things at school G Girl and Happy lad are going on cinema trips and Cheeky Chap is having a christmas party with a visit from Santa , I have to contribute £2.50 towards his gift. I have no problem handing over cash for my kids it just bugs me that these things all seem to come at once when the bank is empty! I have fought for the last eleven years with G Girl and Happy lads shite father over money. He has only been paying his share this year and only because I took him to the CSA . I know I should have done it years ago but im too nice for my own good. I didn’t want to rock the boat while things were nice and sivil between us. To say things are no longer nice would be the understatement of the century! But I now get the money he should pay towards his kids. Things are tight at the moment because im in a dept repayment program so pretty much all my spare cash is taken up by that , its great though it means i’ll be dept free by easter. Its through CAP or Christians against poverty , they are a charity so they don’t take a cut and they give you loads of support too . If you work with them and make all your payments and things they can send you on family holidays and they have fun days and stuff for the kids to do . I feel much better about my future since I started with CAP.
In the new year im going to get stuck into my training course and become a registered childminder , hopefully by August time i’ll be ready to open my home to some little ones and have fun while earning a wage. I can’t wait to be earning again , it’s frustrating to be out of work but untill im qualified there isn’t much I can do . I don’t have any great dreams of being a world concouring entrepreneur or anything, i’d just like to be comfortable .